This Is How You Really Love Someone Through Depression


The phrase ‘love yourself before someone can love you’, doesnt apply to people who have depression. Because more than anything they are learning how to love and accept themselves. But sometimes, it takes following someone elses lead to get there.

What people fail to address is the concept of truly being loved by another person is what will diminish depression. It might not go away but the closest someone can get to beating depression is learning to love another person and learning to let someone love you.


So how do you love someone like this? How do you overcome the battles you might never understand?

1. Through acceptance.

Understand that this might be something you will never understand. Internal battles within ones self, can really only be understood to the core if youve lived through it. So youll have to accept this without fully understanding it. And yes, youll see the impact it might have on the person you love and that might impact you but just know its not something youll get. But you don’t have to understand this to love them.

2. Youre going to see a side to them they hate.

Theres a reason they hide it. Theres a reason a lot of people havent seen it. But youre bound to when you love someone. That person who is positive and upbeat and lights up every room they walk into is only that way because theyve lived through whats on the other side of it. It’s going to be hard at first.

3. Understand who they are at their worst isnt them.

When they choose to let you in that close, what youll realize is how opposite this person in front of you on one of their bad days is compared to the one you fell in love with. Youll notice a change in even their tone of voice. Youll notice a glazed over look in their eyes. Everything about them will be different. Understand the negative thoughts and the words coming out of their mouth, youve never heard before arent them. Its this disease. Depression is a disease.

4. They are going to push you away.

On their bad days, the thoughts will consume them that they arent capable of being loved. Love them anyway. Even when they dont believe it. They will convince themselves they are a burden. Love them anyway. They will think you are better off without them and deserve someone healthy. Choose them anyway. They will tell you to leave more than once. Choose to stay.

5. The bad days will pass.

There will be days they wont want to get out of bed or be productive. There will be days where you look at them and you feel helpless, wishing you could fix it. There will be days you blame yourself as their partner for not making them happier. Dont think like that. This isn’t your fault and it isn’t their fault. There will days where they break down in tears and cant even articulate why they are feeling this way. In those moments, hold them. Be their strength. The best thing you can do is stand beside them on the bad days because like all things, depression is a feeling that will pass. Its a storm that will end. Believe that.

5. Youll learn to appreciate the good days.

More than anything loving someone with depression will teach you an appreciation for things youve never thought about before. Youll appreciate the good days as much as they do and thats what will make it worth it. Just like those good days give them strength on their bad days, it too will give you strength. Because trust me when I say this, the good days outweigh the bad ones.

6. It will be an emotional rollercoaster.

This will test you in a way, youve never been challenged before. But there wont be a better ride in your life. Because people with depression might know such negativity. They might take you to dark places youd never choose. But along with knowing all of that, people with depression have an ability to love so deeply. They have a compassion for others that will teach you to be better. They have eyes that see beyond what is on the surface and their ability to understand and relate to people will be the reason you fell in love with them.

7. But it will be the ride of your life and totally worth it.


People who live with depression also know how to love deeper than anyone in the world.
And if you’re lucky to be on the receiving end of that, their love will fill you in a way those bad days wont even matter. Their love will make you a version of yourself you never thought you would be, in the best way. And it will be through love, you both can continue to beat this together.

Read more: http://thoughtcatalog.com/kirsten-corley/2017/02/this-is-how-you-really-love-someone-through-depression/